Sunday, March 2, 2014

Wall O Text Two: Robotic Rambles and a Dedication


As much as I am online through video gaming, I never thought to devote time to blogging or forums. Have you ever read gamer forums where multiple players write huge "wall- o - text" for attention, to complain or present what they feel is an elaborate strategy amid multiple syntax errors that makes you question whether you should go to bed or stay up longer to explain to them that writing well even on an online game is the most effective strategy for successful communication? Well, life in the education field is just like online gaming. With everyone coming into the classroom from various backgrounds, different generations and carrying multiple agendas, sometimes the classroom feels far too chaotic than I care to tolerate.

I have worked in many classrooms because my working experience is not as happy, upbeat or pleasant as other educators I have met. While I love the education field, I am the triangle in a square classroom. It may look like I fit in from afar but I do not. My sharp corners are always sticking out and I have no reason to hide them. While this trait has really helped me positively change learning environments to support children who educators labeled "difficult" and "misunderstood" by giving them a space to be freely be themselves, it has isolated me from other educators. Some events that happened to me during my teaching journey, especially those in front of children would make you gasp. I did not yield or conform to show children what it means to have courage amid conflict, preserve your individuality as well as analyze the actions of others by developing a careful ear and sensitive eye to write down everything said and each action done to document an occurrence fully. It is exhausting to remember every single detail of situations from the past and present. One of Lisa Delpit's works (1996) had a passage that reminded me there was a lot of work to do in education and really calls us to action. "Time to reassess what we are doing in public schools and universities to include other voices, other experiences; time to seek the diversity in our educational movements that we talk about seeing in our classroom."

The freedom I helped those children realize was their voice. When you speak up with purpose and clarity, children and adults will stop and listen. Sounds easy enough but for adults...speaking up can become difficult or the source of what is now fashionably called "starting drama." In some school environments I have entered, educators only want to hear the only voice they find relevant: the one who signs their timesheet. Even in my experience signing timesheets, hearing voices while using my voice was a skill I was continually developing the difference was I heard all of you. Our temperaments and perceptions are two keys to building a relationship with children, adults and building a community that we embark on from birth and constantly struggle to figure out how to use effectively as we age.

I have really high standards and expectations of people I encounter, especially from educators, so when I feel things are not flowing correctly I will stop you immediately for a discussion. Do you ever wonder why a child stops you during class time when something seems off or unrealistic? Like adults, children have high expectations of adults and are constructing meaning from what is said to make sense of how the adult world works. So we really do need to provide a good example of how to communicate effectively as well as being courageous to speak up while being tactful. Just remember the children are watching adult behavior everywhere you go, both inside and outside of the classroom. Even when you are on vacation! An educator's work is continuous and that is exactly what we signed up for.

I have witnessed and worked with some adults who work very well together and truly support each other throughout their day. Yet, the reality for most of my teaching career is made of teachers battling it out with teachers for dominance in the classroom using a hierarchy based on their education level. We should all be united together so what is the problem? Why is there so much competition among each other for such a low paying career?

As for some administrators who are either forgetting we are all on the same team to pursue revamping the image of children to really change the status of children and education or they just want it their way out of arrogance and ego. As educators, we want children to become independent, competent and innately motivated to seek knowledge so why are teachers with less education accepting being turned into robots and doing what they are told without question? Is it originating from fear of losing their job? Is there a sense of hopelessness or complacency? What do the children we teach have to look forward to in their adult life if they can only enjoy their freedom, competence and independence during their childhood? 

I have always felt this fire to pursue everything I could in life. I remember how my passion (in this case my outspokenness) during undergrad caught the attention of one of my older classmates in Japanese class during my sophomore year. He was a seven year senior, it was common at that school for students to take multiple years to finish their degree. Many students chose to work or begin a career early and left university but return in their late 20's and 30's to finish their Bachelor degree. So this student told me when he was younger he was just like me but his fire died as he aged and mine would too. I wish I kept in touch with him to tell him my passion is even worse now! When I bought my first 30 Seconds to Mars CD in December 2009, I realized Closer to the Edge embodied my teaching career. There are times when I feel like my time in the classroom is over and then I am suddenly pulled right back into it. Teaching on the edge fueled my school age curriculum to break boundaries using technology, foreign language and social play in a way that supported children's individuality and learning style. This occurrence helped me understand my time in the classroom is just a part of my journey so I do wonder where my next adventure in education will take me. But to begin this journey the correct way, a very quick dedication to all the teachers and administrators who behaved badly during my teaching journey, I finally bid you farewell. Your actions allowed me to focus even harder on gaining even more knowledge and fire because let’s face it you will always stay exactly who and where you are while I am sailing forward.

When you check out the video there is a lot going on visually and verbally. I recommend listening to the lyrics first and then the interviews from the youth and watching at the visuals last.  Enjoy!





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